Well, the journey with my husband’s health has taken on a new twist…an exciting twist, that is.
Because we are so far away from family to help, we have had to sign up for COPES…which is long term health care services for people who need it. Along with COPES, we have had therapists and other medical staff in and out. Some have been great help while others have been mediocre. We had to release one already for overstepping some boundaries and in the midst of the overstep, she neglected my husband.
Yet, even with the ups and downs, we have learned the following:
1) I’ve had to release pride and allow them to help since I can use the time to work on school, job hunt, and other household stuff that they are not allowed to handle.
2) That outside help people are humans and I do not need to judge them because of the work they do. One guy – who has been with us since the beginning -has been great. He treats my husband with respect and is kind to him as he takes care of the most mundane things for my husband. Even my cat – the man hater – is warming up to him! Of course, he has his own cats so he knows how to treat them.
3) That is great to have someone help clean the house and other household chores. It’s great not to worry about my back as I dumped heavy garbage into the dumpster. He can even help clean and organize the boxes/furniture in my husband’s room. What great help!
4) That sometimes you need to speak up because people like the therapists think they know more than you do about your loved one. Yeah, I know they know more about therapy than I do but I also know how my husband handles things and what his habits and routines are.
5) That my husband is amazingly smart! He has been training on an electric wheelchair to see if he qualifies – well he passed that test and now once we get through the paperwork, hopefully he will have one by spring. They want to create a video so he can help other blind people use one – they were amazed that a blind man can use one!
6) That God uses people like medical staff, caregivers, and therapists to be humble and to show you what true compassion is. That no matter how dirty something is that being a servant is worth being and that you need to be a servant back to these people because they are taking care of your loved one. Plus hubby is being a witness to the original one and we are praying that his heart softens and we can win him to God’s kingdom.
So, yeah, in conclusion, it’s been great having the help and I wish we could treat them like good friends and family yet we must keep boundaries as we treat them with respect, compassion, and humbleness. Now, I can leave for short periods of time or even during the day when God blesses me with a job and not worry about hubby…so yes, God is good and so is people to help out around the house though I do have to be careful that I do not become to complacent so I’m fortunate to still be able to do something on the weekends or days when we do not have help.
What have you learned if you ever had a caregiver or other medical staff in your home?